The Summer of Realizations

I have come to think of this as the summer of realizations. I have learned so very much about myself this summer, from random things to more significant ones. I suppose I've just become a more reflective person. It's interesting how life unfolds when you start to embrace things about you and not try to mask them. Then there are the more goofy things that I wouldn't necessarily say I'm embracing: like the fact that I flinch...all the time...about anything. It's kind of embarassing now that I've realized I do it: A cabinet door can slam or a person scream loudly and I nearly jump out of my skin! I can even KNOW that something is going to happen and I still flinch when it does! So, I decided that I would open up and explain some of the things that I realized about myself this summer: things that many of you have known about me for much longer I'm sure. I will not include the ones that are on my post from GPAT institute. I am not going to add repetitive to my list of realizations ;-) One thing that is NOT a new realization is the fact that my memory is pretty sporadic, so you may want to check this post often as I'm sure it will be updated as I think of/learn new things.

• There are underlying causes to a change in a kid's behavior. So many kids are stressed or hurting and I used to just think they were "being a stinker". (On the flip side of this, I still firmly believe that the world and your future employer do not care what you're going through, so you have to man up and do what you're supposed to do).
• I am prone to have anxiety: especially over things I cannot change. In a way, I'm thankful for it because it brings me to my knees for some serious prayer. Nothing can take away my fears like spending time with God.
• Just because a child cannot communicate with me verbally does not mean that she cannot communicate. It's my responsibility to find out how communication is expressed.
• Because I am blunt, I seem harsh via text or e-mail. This is why I overuse exclamation points and have taken to using emoticons (something I use to refuse simply because of the name). I'd rather be portrayed as overzealous or childish than rude.
• Having spent time in a job I abhorred and finding a position that truly makes me happy, I will not entertain the idea of moving in the future. I cannot imagine leaving the greatest job ever because the next position could be like the first.
• It is a bad idea to sit in the car and turn your a/c on without turning the car on. It goes dead and then you have to call your husband to come jump your car off. In hindsight, I remember my dad telling me that. Perhaps that's truly the realization: You should listen to your parents!
• I have the greatest husband in the world and am in the best marriage! Our dynamic may not work for everyone, but it works very well for us and it annoys me when people suggest it should be otherwise.
• I miss my Mom #2. Certainly nowhere near as much as Carla or the rest of her family, but she is a great part of my life even to this day. I wish I'd written down everything she said, as her words, although hilarious, were very wise. It makes me smile when I find myself quoting her (both because of the memories and the fact that some of her sayings were just really funny).
• I feed off the energy of others, be it positive or negative. If someone comes to me with a problem that I cannot fix and they're looking on the bright side, I'll be more apt to do the same. If they're stressing, I stress as well. But, I have learned that reassuring words said with confidence work wonders to calm me. In fact, I recently saved a text because it said "Don't stress, it'll be fine. Promise".
• Friends come in many forms. They come from different backgrounds, with different beliefs, and serving different purposes. I am thankful for my friends and thankful to have lived in a town long enough to have some new friends!
• I prefer to drive on the interstate through a large city as opposed to a smaller town.
• My best girl friend in the entire world is someone I strive to be like...not in that commandment-breaking covetous way, but because she embodies what a Christian should be. While she's not perfect (she's human, after all), she does her best every day to be the best Christian, wife, and friend. Carla, you are truly amazing to me and I love you!
• Feelings are real, no matter how absurd they may seem.